Democracy at 40,000 feet

Our republic is democratic in that it is controlled by public opinion, but our Constitution requires patience and persistence for the people to express that opinion through elections.

Our Founders did not believe that the people have a right to enact whatever laws the majority necessarily want, but, rather, that the people have a right to enact whatever laws the people as a whole think are just. That higher aspiration requires deliberation, but also time. The name the Founders most often gave to this form of government was “republic.”

To better understand the unnatural folly of “democracy,”  we’ve whipped up a little allegory for you.

Imagine yourself a passenger on a commercial airplane cruising along at an altitude of 40,000 feet. During the flight, the pilot suffers a heart attack and dies at the controls. Upon seeing his long-time friend and colleague expire right before his eyes, the grief-stricken co-pilot suffers a debilitating stroke.

As the plane safely cruises while on auto-pilot, Sally Stewardess, speaking over the intercom,  informs the 187 passengers plus crew of what has just happened; and asks if there is anyone on board who can safely land the plane when it approaches its final destination. Luckily for all on board, a decorated U.S. Air Force “top gun” pilot who has also flown massive bombers just happens to be one of the passengers. Mr. Maverick, we’ll call him, calmly steps forward, presents himself, and reassures the frightened crowd of his qualifications, “Don’t worry folks. I got this.”  The crowd cheers!

At that moment, a neurotic middle-aged woman named Nancy starts jumping up and down like a game-show contestant on “The Price is Right” — hootin’ and hollerin’ — “I once drove a school bus in Kalamazoo, Missouri. I think I can do this.”

“Sit down and shut up you silly woman,” shouts one of the passengers.

“Hey! That’s not very civil,” a female passenger responds.

Nattering Nancy then shrieks to the mob of passengers:

“Why shouldn’t I be given the chance to be hero? Just because I’m a woman? Let’s put it to a democratic vote! You all believe in majority rule, don’t you? If I lose, so be it, but at least the people will be the ones deciding — not some soldier boy wannabee dictator!

To the shock of the veteran pilot, the “consensus” of passengers nod and murmur in agreement that the decision to choose a new pilot be a “democratic” one. A mini-campaign ensues, during which the Air Force ace brutally mocks “Nutty Nancy” and calmly tells of his 20 years of flying experience, numerous aerial combat exploits and countless awards received. But it is the ex-bus driver who really steals the show — and a “show” is exactly what it is!

Finger wagging furiously in the air while standing on her chair and screaming at the top of her lungs, Neurotic Nancy shrieks: “Free drinks and movies for all when I’m elected! And for all you oppressed passengers in the economy section, you’ll have a chance to rotate places with the greedy millionaires and billionaires in first class!” 

Working in bus driver Nancy’s favor is the sympathetic stewardess and her blaring intercom (Fake News) — virtue-shaming everyone about how important it is to “break the glass ceiling”  by electing a woman pilot; and smearing Mr. Maverick as being “racist,”  “sexist”  and “for the rich passengers.”  After a bitter debate and quick campaign, incompetent Nancy wins the pilot election by just a single vote — partly because of the free stuff she promised everybody, and partly due to Mr. Maverick’s “negative campaigning” against her really turned off some of the intercom-addicted female passengers and even a few of the pussified males.

1. Nutty Nancy from Kalamazoo thinks she’s qualified to land an airliner! 

2. Silly Sally the Stewardess uses the intercom to rig the election in Nancy’s favor.

3. Sorry Maverick, but in a “democracy,” ability and honor don’t count for nuthin’!

About an hour into the ridiculous reign of the new pilot, the plane begins to rapidly descend in a most erratic manner. By that time, most of the passengers are too drunk or too engrossed in their free movies to even notice. “Get out of that cabin you silly hag! Let me have the controls!” shouts Mr. Maverick as he storms the cabin. The crazy captainette responds, “How dare you! Go away, you authoritarian fascist! The people have spoken! Security, remove this Nazi from my cabin!”

As our would-be hero is escorted away, the captainette’s deluded groupies — incited by the silly stewardess — spit at him and mock him with their hate-filled chants: “Racist, Nazi, anti-gay, Air-Force fascist go away! Racist, Nazi, anti-gay, Air-Force fascist go away!… Racist, Nazi ….”

—- The plane then crashes, killing everyone on board.

That’s “democracy”  for ya, boys and girls. The only difference between that allegorical scenario above and the real life lesson is that in the former, only the lives of a couple hundred people were put at risk, and ultimately destroyed. But in the real world, the lives and happiness of billions — plus billions more yet born — hang in the balance. Think about it.

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